Saturday, September 26, 2009

Bloggy Meltdown

For some reason I just haven't been able to get my brain in blogging gear lately. My fingers are itching to stroke the keys but my brain seems to be on temporary holiday with no note stating when it will return.

Some funny things happened today so I'm going to try to work on writing those out this weekend. In the mean time, I wanted to share some pictures of how I not only how I rang in my 32nd birthday, but also marked another thing off my bucket list. HOT AIR BALLOON!!!

I did this while we were on a trip to Indianapolis in August. Also visited John Dillingers grave and got way more up close and personal with table top war playing games that I normally care to.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Smashing the Clock

I remember when I started this blog four years ago. Newly heartbroken, facing the holidays and wondering how I was going to convince my grandparents that being single did not mean that I was a lesbian.

I've spent years straining to even hear myself think over the "tick tock, tick tock" that echoed within me with such ferocity that I was certain it was causing involuntary muscle spasms.

I held hope with each passing relationship that "this time" would be different. That "this one" would posses the super secret code key needed to deactivate the ticking time bomb trailing behind me.

With each failure, my hope got mushed...to the point that all that remained was a fine white dust settling around me. And I resigned myself to the fact that the things that I sought so desperately, would forever be out of my reach.

Then, 2008 swooshed in.

It knocked me on my ass, took my milk money and disappeared before I could raise the alarm.

As bruised and offended as I was...I came to be grateful. Grateful because 2009 came to the aid of a damsel in distress. He picked me up off the pavement, dusted me off...and opened the car door for me. And in the brief moment of that kind gesture I realized...the-ticking-had-stopped.

Call it an epiphany, an awakening, a sign from on high...whatever suits your fancy.

But in that moment of realization, I stopped watching the clock...and IT stopped watching me.

I have learned to appreciate what each day brings and to look forward to what lies ahead. I have learned that life is what you make of it and that the only voice in your head you should listen to is your own...(just make sure you don't answer it because otherwise people will think you are schitzo.)

And above all, I have learned that until I have my own, I can kiss and love on the sweet baby nephews and hand them back to mom when Aunt Sissy smells a poo.

Tuesday, September 08, 2009

The Susie Homemaker Disaster

Growing up in a family where most of the meals consisted of whatever was quick and easy, I failed to acquire any real cooking skills beyond the very basics. Which, much to my chagrin, makes my current situation all the more comical.

But as my mom has said when I ask stupid questions or do stupid things, "Well how are you supposed to know, you're new at this."

New indeed. Sigh. Last week there might have been a little problem with the mixer which might have caused lots and lots of little bits of dough to fling themselves haphazardly around the kitchen and stick to every surface in a 3 foot radius. Myself included.

Then of course there was THE incident. The one where I was making dinner and took a break to check my emails. Well, let's just say it wasn't long before the distinct smell of something burning caught my nose. I was out of my chair and skidding around the kitchen corner in 2 seconds flat. Flinging open the oven door, I got a billow of hot, smelly, smoke right to the face.

See, that's when the panic set in. It wasn't from the thought or concern of if the house could have burned down. My ever increasing panic arose from trying to figure out how I was going conceal the evidence of my dinner faux pas from my significant other before he walked in the door at any moment.

First order of business was to destroy the evidence. The charred bits formerly known as dinner, found a new home at the bottom of my garbage disposal where they could never ever rat on me.

Next task was to dispatch the smoke. This required prying open each and every door and window on the lower level, not to mention an elaborate set up of fans to pump out the dense, gray clouds and usher in fresh air.

Top it all off with a healthy dousing of Febreeze and no one was ever the wiser.

All I can say is, thank god for Chinese take out.

Thursday, September 03, 2009

The Return of the Spinster

It's an odd sensation you know.

The feeling of keys moving beneath my fingers...words magically appearing. I can't believe I'm...blogging. Ha!

For awhile I was afraid the term, "Use it or lose it" was going to show up and stick itself to me just to prove a point. I mean let's face it. I've not posted properly in a good year or more.

I miss it.

Life got too busy for awhile. A tornado of events that I have banished to the deepest, darkest abyss a lifetime away.

The past is just that. The past...no explanation necessary.

Now...I am happy. Sickeningly happy. So happy, that I am co-habitating. *GASP!* I know, but wait it gets worse.

I cook.

(wait for it......)

And, I like it.

*HOLY HELL!!!!*

Yup, it's like you've walked into the twilight zone isn't it? I know what you're doing, you're checking the blog title aren't you? Making sure you're reading the right one, that you haven't stumbled across some awful Susie Homemaker site. It's okay. I won't hold it against you.

It's still me. I just share a closet and wield heavy cookware.

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