Flag On The Play
Last night I listened as one girl painfully recounted her break up story to friends. She scrubbed at her eyes as she fought to choke out the words in-between sobs. It was impossible not to feel compassion at her pain. At least until I actually heard her utter the words, "No, don't say that. I wish him all the happiness in the world. No really. I do. I hope he and this new girlfriend are very happy together."
That's it.
Time out.
*Blowing Whistle*
Flag on the play.
I'm calling BS.
Never have I ever looked at a boyfriend who had just dumped me and said, "I hope you have a really great life." Let's be realistic about this. The more appropriate response would be, "I hope you get hit by a Mack Truck."
Not that we really wish him physical harm (depends...a little broken leg never killed anyone right?). But we certainly don't wish him well. Especially with some other girl/slut.
Face it, when you've just had your heart broken, the very last thing you're concerned with is the asshole's wellness. The truth comes to this...what we really wish is that he gets fat, that he goes bald, that he gets 30 speeding tickets, that he comes down with an extra terrible case of the flu, that he sits home miserable and alone everynight, that his new ho leaves him for someone else, and most of all...we squeeze our eyes shut tight make a wish that he will forever regret the day he let us go.
Now that my friends is the truth.
posted by Lindsey @ 4/25/2006 06:00:00 PM
39 Comments:
I think she was just saying that out loud in order to try and make herself actually believe it.
I agree with you, it's bullshit. If someone has hurt my feelings like that, i'm not wishing them well. I wish them all the unhappiness the world can bring.
I think maybe she loved him that much that she actually wants him to be happy. Maybe--or maybe it's just a PR quote.
I'm going to put my money on the 5 stages of grief.
-Denial
-Anger/Blame
-Bargaining
-Depression
-Acceptance
The girl has not yet met up with ANGER.
Don't worry. Her time will come.
how much is my blog worth / not worth ?
i sure am glad
i am not your Ex
amen!
Don't kid yourself Linny. That never happens to us.
lol,
happened to mine and more,
sorry to spoil the fun,
didn't make me feel better about it.
You're such a natural! - how you come up with these posts each day, all great! I'm completely green-eyed!!! :-D
haha!
well yes in a way ur right and wrong!
Sometimes when ur so deeply in love that u almost feel guilty even thinking anything bad abt the other person....it differs from people to people..!
But the most natural emotion is what you wrote in ur blog!
god I love to have a woman use a sports metaphor!
She shoots ... she scores!!
The honest truth sister Linny!! No one should be wishing their ex well until after they have already gotten some sort of sweet revenge. Period.
How can you be over someone until you have?
Oh hell yeah - never ever have I genuinely wished my ex well with his Courtney replacement. Not just after a breakup, anyway. It takes time to get to a point where you're no longer wishing them weight gain, rashes, muscle cramps, fingernail discoloration and/or fungus, chicken pox and last but not least penis erectile dysfunction :) LOL
Good One Linny.
She may have been experiencing shock...
Maybe even though she was in a bad dream...
I am sure when it sinks in, that the ahole did a dirty move on her...
She will be able to face that it is over.
My trick was always to be really nice and sweet and forgiving towards the ex, but a total bitch towards the new girlfriend.
See, that way, the new girlfriend will whine and complain about me to the ex, but he'll be like, What the hell are you talking about? Ashley's a sweetheart!
Then he'll think SHE'S the bitch, and totally dump her. Ask me back out, and I'll say, Hell no, Fatty McGhee! Go back to your skank!!
Ha!
(Sigh)
Great post, Linny me girl. Funny, honest. Well written.
I'm never going to stop reading your blog, ever! It's that good. :)
Thanks for all the kind words elsewhere. You're so nice to me! Makes me feel special.
Have a great day!
Happy Wednesday,
~ Ash
I've fantasised about poisoning my X.
I wish someone would.
I hope he gets sacked.
I hope he gets ugly.
I hope all sorts of nasty things.
But in the few months after we first broke up, I sent him a birthday card, recommended him as a boyfriend to an aquaintance, and told people it was amicable!!
Your brain messes with you sometimes...
Good on you for calling it. Get her in touch with her feelings.
I like to think that I'm actually wishing them well, and that I want them to be happy, but I really just want them to be happy with me, and when that doesn't happen I'm not happy for them at all. And then...another stage kicks in.
Regret is not going to happen except to losers.
And no one wants to date losers.
I agree. I'm fine with the truth, as long as they're not lying about it...the best feeling you can achieve towards an ex that just dumped you is indifference...
right on girlfriend,
who does that? wish an ex well?
Unless we are the ones who break up with them bc of someone else or something then we wish them well,
shit, girlfriend had her roles in reverse....
I believe her. My ex deserves love like I provided for him. If it's not me providin it, I hope it's someone else who will love him like i did. I really truly wish him all the happiness in the world. It's not denial. It's called "reality". Who has time for "revenge"? I'd rather spend that time on more useful things, like finding another person to love. Revenge never gets anyone anywhere, except jail.
Valerie...did you dump him or did he dump you? Amiccable break ups do exist but they are extremely hard to come by.
One fine day I found out the my ex's new lady has really big teeth. I never smiled so big.
AMEN!!!!
Yet anohter reminder of how much I hate BS.
When THE EX broke up with me and started dating his best friend I wanted him to feel physical pain. If I had said I wished him well I would have said it sarcastically. I was hurting and I wanted him to hurt too. But that was a long time ago and it I took me at least a year before I could say "I wish him well" and actually mean it. I had to look at the relationship with an analytical eye and come to the realization on my own that we didn't fit. I still care for him and maybe in a few more years I could actually try to be his friend (if the situation ever came up, but don't quote me)
you are so right...I would never wish and x well just after leaveing me for another girl...
I don't go threw the stages. I go right to anger/Blame to acceptance that he is an ass!
but thats just me
Linny, he broke up with me. But it wasn't a selfish reason why he did. He did it because we were long distance most of the 3 years.
I've only had one hostle break up. And I broke up with him and he went hostile on me. The rest of them, I actually still talk to every now and then.
LOL...i have never wished for the day that they regret breaking up with me, but I have gotten that phone call, that says "breaking up with you was the biggest mistake of my life."
On more than one occassion. It validates to me that they were complete morons to begin with, and that im better off without them...however, I also dont get super upset about these things, and can immediately be friends with exes. This works on my end, but never on theirs...they need time. And by the time I get that "phone call", ive lost all interest, and could care less.
You eventually can get to the point that you don't want your ex to be attacked by hissing cockroaches but I have never heard of anyone actually wishing their ex a good life. What is she, an alien?
I agree! I have NEVER wished an ex happiness with another chick. NEVER! NEVER! NEVER!
AND, if you ever see him out again, you best be looking damn good so he can wallow in what he lost. Right on!
I'll agree...
call it evil thoughs, but i'll be happy if the guys's butt is Bit by thousand poisonous killer bees…. Only he should not die but suffer the consequences of an ugly butt full of pus.
Amen! A plaugue on all my exes ;)
When it's all about you, of course this relationship (or any other) isn't going to work out.
What the hell is it with these anonymous people not having the nerve to leave their names with their comments?
I appreciate different thoughts, but if you're going to say something rude...have the nerve to stand behind what you say instead of hiding.
"Something rude" - There I said it! Ok that was just sarcastic, but I haven't commented here in a LONG time and I had to come back with something close to my nature.
I agree with angel, jr., I think that lady was just making good PR with her "wish him well" comment. It sounds like a line out of a movie anyway....so maybe her romance was based upon her favorite movie? And like all movies must end....her love life also came to an end. So sad.
That's when I knew my ex was full of shit... When she, after ten years, handed me my walking papers.
"I really do wish you the best..."
Yeah, right.
i wish some exes well.
now.
5 years later.
:-)
I second that!
Maybe I am dating different ass holes, I mean guys.
It's been my experience that "have a nice life" can carry all the hurt and venom you need. But just in case, it helps to lure them into situations where they might get hit by a mack truck.
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