More of the Same
Men are the same...no matter where you go.
And no matter what country you visit...you will always be subjected to crude and obnoxious pick up lines. For instance:
1. I'm not staring at your breasts...I'm looking at your necklace.
2. Will you sit on my face? I promise I'll give you Christmas and Birthday all rolled into one.
3. You have a little Irish in you eh'? Would you like some more?
4. (Conversation stops abruptly and you look over and realize he's staring at your breasts with eyes that are slightly glazed over.) With a shake of his head he says, "I'm sorry, I just can't stop staring at your tits. They're amazing."
5. Come home with me. I'll give you money, I'll give you jewels. Whatever you wish. I just want to show you the kindness of the people of Dubai. If I hit you or mistreat you...you can leave. (What the fuck?!)
6. How much did he just offer you? I'll double it!
7. Come back to my apartment. It'll be innocent...I swear. I've got some nice cider up there.
8. Oh come on...please. Just come over and stay the night. Nothing will happen I swear! I've got an extra bedroom...it has a lock. I won't try to rape you I promise.
*Sigh*
And ya'll wonder why I'm still single.
posted by Lindsey @ 9/05/2006 08:41:00 PM
24 Comments:
Linny, so quite true, you would wonder if they all were brought up in the same way with the same info wired into their brains since birth.
wow...while they all made me snicker, I think I would have to pick #5, just for the absurdity. I was inclined to pick #4 but having actually heard that one addressed to me firsthand, it's not so much funny as it is tragic...
I happen to be right there with ya and see why you're single. I get this same crap.
So which one did you fall for?
You know, just for research purposes....
whatever happened to "nice shoes..."
I know why you are single. You haven't met me yet.
O, and yes men are pigs.
Men actually these things to you? Amazing. If I did not know better, I'd swear you were making this stuff up. Thanks for sharing and making me smile :)
see
i never said any of them things
i'm a good boy (most of the time)
Yep...Pete...you were a good boy.
I agree, men are the same everywhere you go. I'm actually hoping to go to Dubai this year, hopefully i won't run into that muck muck.
HAHA!
That sounds like the speed dating round from 40 Year Old Virgin.
I have overheard some abysmal lines myself in clubs and on the street. I saw this one guy yelling at some woman who was walking down the street, "LET ME TAKE YOU HOME, BABY! I'LL BUY YOU A LOBSTA! I'LL BUY YOU A LOBSTA! I'LL BUY YOU A LOBSTA!"
That cracked me up.
LOL!!! @ How much did he just offer you? I'll double it!
DOUBLE linny....they boys LOVED you over there!!
and here I thought that I had some lame lines LOL
men r having sex 24/7...in their heads. I so know this just by the look on their faces!
Keshi.
Wow, do any of these lines actually ever work? I think I need to do a study.
I'm glad you had a good trip. Post photos if you have any!!!!
Maybe your standards are set a little too high!!! I mean they are promising not to hit or rape you, thats a good sign right?
I dropped my film off to be developed and when I went to pick it up yesterday, they had the nerve to tell me that THEY CAN'T FIND THEM!!! I am so livid I can't stand it. They say they'll call me today but I'm not waiting. I'll be calling the supervisor first thing this morning.
Pete...FYI...that film is the one that has the pictures of us on it.
i like'em all :)
m
Well, that put me in a state of giggles. My favourite: You have a little Irish in you eh'? Would you like some more? How could that not win you over, I have to ask?! :-D
my goodness! i would imagine you would be able to find a better species of man on another continent, but I guess not! ick! Pardon my spelling :) Long day!
Dont I know it!!! Men can be so well crude if nothing else! ~M
i love #5...lol
I don't know, cider is always tempting. :)
The most cringe-worthy I have ever heard came from a Hollywood A-lister. I can't remember if it was Lenny Kravitz or Prince, or which actress/model/singer he was addressing, but the line was 'Please tell me your name, because last night in my dream I didn't know what to call you'. Would probably sound OK in a Tom Hanks movie, but not in real life. A great Scottish alternative is 'Fancy going halves on a b@stard?'
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