Saturday, January 28, 2006

Speaking of Fishing...

Wednesday night I was pulled from my American Idol fixation by the sound of my cell phone vibrating violently across the coffee table. I should have taken this as a sign. Instead....I made a rookie mistake. I answered the phone even though I didn't recognize the number calling.

At first there was silence, then a young male voice saying, "Yes...uh...I was calling about getting some more Sprint minutes and uh...I need to get a loan." Complete silence on my end. My thumb deftly reached for the "end" button. Then suddenly I heard, "Hello? Linny? Hey...it's Conway."

Oh Fuuuuuuuuuuck!!!!! Conway is the little twerp (aka: former co-worker) that weezled me into giving him my phone number even though it was against my better judgement. Dammit! It had been at least 2 or 3 weeks since I'd last seen him so I thought for sure I was safe against unwanted phone harrassment. Apparently I was wrong.

The next 15 minutes were the most painful of my life. It was the most awkward conversation I have ever had with anyone. He spent most of it trying to get me to agree to go out with him and when I repeatedly turned him down...he finally asked me if I'd at least call him at work the next day. "What kind of work do you do?"

He pauses..."Well, have you heard of InTouch magazine?"

"Yes."

"I read it."

"Bye Conway." *click*

I firmly believe that he was either drunk or completely stoned during the phone call. Needless to say, I saved his number in my cell phone and he is hereby known as: " Do Not Answer".

17 Comments:

Blogger Natalie said...

What does that mean, he reads it?
We will never know now!

I like that.. DO NOT ANSWER as the name in your phone book.

1/28/2006 1:02 PM  
Blogger TrĂ©e said...

Linny, may your weekend with drama free. On second thought, how would you entertain us with your fabulous postings. Okay, okay, go have some drama--the good kind. Have a great weekend my ice cream loving girl. :-)

1/28/2006 1:50 PM  
Blogger Princess Pessimism said...

LOL! You know, a few years ago, I had a similar case with a guy who was collectively known as "BasePaul". He was the baseball coach of one of the kids I used to work with. Anyway..we hit it off really well, and talked quite a bit...and when he became really obsessive, I started to recognize his number and not answer. Well, He starts calling me from different numbers to see if i'd pick up...In total, I had 4 seperate numbers stored into my phone that he had called me from saying things like "It's him again" and "He's MENTAL"

One day, I was out for a walk with ashley, my phone rings in my pocket. It's him. The conversation was something along the lines of "Hi Paul...Did you know I had call display on my phone, and saw that you called me 15 times already today?" He says "Uh...Oh...no I didnt know that" I say "Bye Paul" Its the last time I ever talked to him.

1/28/2006 2:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I know a girl who has multiple DO NOT ANSWER in her phone. Good stuff.

1/28/2006 2:45 PM  
Blogger Valerie said...

I have one of those "do no answer" numbers on my cell too. :)

1/28/2006 3:51 PM  
Blogger Cheryl said...

I've had a number stored at DNA too. But part of me hopes he was drunk or stoned and not just that dumb.

1/28/2006 4:01 PM  
Blogger Innocent Bystander said...

he he he, you women are evil he he

Us poor men... so misunderstood.

1/28/2006 4:01 PM  
Blogger Chuckles said...

Damn. I may be listed in one or two girl's phones as do not answer, but I only call once and I never ask for a phone number if I don't get a good vibe.

1/28/2006 4:43 PM  
Blogger Autumn Storm said...

'DO NOT ANSWER' - like that.
As for the rest, sounds excrutiating!

1/28/2006 5:37 PM  
Blogger tsduff said...

Oh Linny, you ought to write a book with anecdotes in it... the stuff you live through becomes a hundred times funnier when you put it into words :-D. Sorry you missed some of American Idol for THAT!

1/28/2006 5:39 PM  
Blogger Drywall Mom said...

Jobless, and a loser, man it doesn't get better than that. Good idea on saving that number for your own sake.

1/28/2006 9:53 PM  
Blogger Fuckkit said...

Tell him you're not interested but your brother might be. That'll freak him out :)

1/29/2006 6:16 AM  
Blogger Huw said...

DNA, why didn't I think of that? My usual course is to delete unwanted callers' number, which, obviously, isn't that smart.

This InTouch magazine: should I know it?

1/29/2006 9:22 AM  
Blogger Steph said...

That's too funny! I think we all have a few "Do Not Answers" in our phonebook! What's funny is they shouldn't even have our number to begin with! LOL At least you didn't give in to a date! Go Linny!

1/29/2006 1:30 PM  
Blogger Adam said...

"I need a loan for some more minutes."

I've heard some bad pick up lines in my day, but that one might be in the top 10.

One day technology will allow us to filter out the drunk dialers and allow us to pre-program our phones to avoid being guilty of the same.

Your real "rookie" mistake was letting it go on for 15 minutes!

1/29/2006 5:26 PM  
Blogger PAINKEY said...

That is so funny, he probably was drunk dialing....

1/30/2006 11:17 AM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

Dude, if I had caller ID then I'd never answer the phone again, the only thing that gets me to pick it up at all is the curiousity about who is calling me.

1/30/2006 12:33 PM  

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