How To Lose a Guy the Morning After
Now, I know we are all nice and wholesome individuals who would normally never do anything with reckless abandon...
*wink wink*
Buuuuut, I'm sure that somewhere in our past there has been that one itsy bitsy little indiscretion. Like, maybe that one guy you met at the bar that had the great dimples. The one who just happened to follow you home and subsequently tripped and fell on top of you in the bed.
You know...those types of things.
But what happened the next morning when you woke and realized...yeah, he DOES have nice dimples...but why didn't I notice that they rest of him looks like a bad porn actor!!! At that point you start trying to recall exactly how many shots you had downed the night before and as you gaze over at the lump snoring beside you, suddenly you just feel all sorts of dirty because you realize...EWWWWWWWW! He touched you!
So the question becomes...how do YOU get him out of your bed and out of your house? And before you ask...no, I do not currently have this problem but it HAS happened in the past...Ick, I can't even think about it. Let's just say, I woke up in the middle of the night, very sober and very freaked out. I snuck out and spent the rest of the night on the couch!
posted by Lindsey @ 3/03/2007 05:48:00 PM
16 Comments:
I hear ya.
Now imagine you were a heterosexual guy who got drunk in a gay bar.....
....oh the horror!
As long as we are the ones doing the sneaking towards the couch, it's all good. :-D
this made me laugh. great narrative skillz, babe.
That should be subtle enough to work. If not, give him an "it was a mistake" and do not give him your phone number.
Wait, I'd like to think that even in my/your worst drunken state you/I would be wise enough not to bring him to my/your house. I imagine it would be much easier to just sneak out of his place in the middle of the night than it would be to kick him out of your place. Plus, I mean, ick - then he would know where you lived and there would be nasty boy germs all over the place. Ick.
Yeah. Good times :)
Thank goodness those days are no longer!!!
Haha, i'm with SS on this one. I've always gone to their home. Geez, I just made it sound like it happens all the time "always" haha, not true. But it has happened once or twice.
i would say that you should get your sister to come round with colby and get her to tell you it's ont fair that she should have to look after your kid while you go out and get laid...then you should look at the bloke and ask if he wants to play daddy...
that should work
either that or roll over in the morning and ask him whe yuo're going to get married
the whole idea of commitment to men like that should scare them out of bed very quickly
lol - I kick them out right after wards. I hardly ever see the guy the next morning. No way jose! I sleep ALONE!
Ive said "ohh...you need to go home", and when they started to say something, I said "you need to go"...and then thats it. I dont put up with that shit
my sister would never do something like that! LOL
Say you have to work the next day or are sick and don't feel well (female issues). Not one single guy will argue w/ you there.
OH DEAR LORD !!!! I am so glad I got married!!! LOL
thats a good one. i would wake him up in a panic stat tellin him he only has a few minutes to get the fuck out of there before your husband gets home. he will say, "but i thought you were single," you can say, "yeah, i thought u were cute"...lol...that damn liquor!!!!
I just started reading your blog... LOVE IT!
nerdgirlsspace@blogspot
If he is still unconscious, make him up like a drag queen.
When he wakes, say you are a lesbian and that in the bad lighting you thought he was a woman.
Ivan the seer
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